The Curious Case of Selective Decorum!

 

A few weeks ago, I came across a video post on twitter that left me puzzled, not because of what people were arguing about, but because of how differently they seemed to apply the same standards.

In that post, Kangana Ranaut was criticized by many for wearing an off-shoulder gown while receiving a National Award for Tanu Weds Manu Returns. Whether one liked the outfit or not, the criticism was familiar: a National Award ceremony is a prestigious occasion, a formal state event, and therefore deserving of a certain decorum.

In the same post, Actress Kriti Sanon was widely praised for wearing a beautiful saree while receiving her own National Award years later. Her choice, seeing it as elegant, graceful, and appropriate for the occasion was widely appreciated.

So far, so good.

But then came a Raksha Bandhan advertisement in which the same actress celebrated the festival wearing an outfit that revealed far more skin than the gown for which Kangana was criticized in that video post.

And that is where my question begins.

This Is Not About Policing Women's Clothing

Before someone rushes to label this as an attack on women's freedom, let me clarify my position.

I have no problem with women wearing whatever they feel comfortable in. A saree, a gown, a swimsuit, shorts, jeans, or a business suit: an adult woman is perfectly capable of making her own choices.

My issue is not the clothing.

My issue is the selective standards.

If clothing does not matter and only intentions matter, then Kangana should never have been criticized for wearing an off-shoulder gown to a National Award ceremony.

If, on the other hand, cultural occasions deserve a certain symbolic presentation and decorum, then surely that principle should apply consistently.

What troubles me is not the outfit itself but the inconsistency in how we judge it.

The Influence of Public Figures

Like it or not, actors and actresses influence society.

People imitate their fashion, language, attitudes, and lifestyle choices. We may claim that celebrities are "just entertainers," but their influence on culture is undeniable.

That is precisely why their choices are constantly discussed and scrutinized.

When an actress chooses to wear a saree while receiving a National Award, many interpret it as respect for the occasion. When another actress wears a traditional outfit during a festival advertisement, people interpret that too as a message.

Clothing is often treated as symbolic, whether we like it or not.

So if symbolism matters in one context, why does it suddenly stop mattering in another?

Traditions Evolve and That's Fine

I am not arguing that Raksha Bandhan must remain frozen in time.

In fact, I welcome many modern interpretations of the festival.

I encourage my own sons to tie rakhi to each other.

To me, Raksha Bandhan is not merely about a brother protecting a sister. It is about love, mutual respect, responsibility, and standing by those who matter to us.

If a sister ties a rakhi to another sister, I appreciate it.

If friends tie rakhi to each other, I appreciate that as well.

If someone symbolically ties a rakhi to a pet they consider family, that is their choice. I appreciate that too!

Traditions survive precisely because they evolve.

But evolution and symbolism are not opposites.

A tradition can evolve while still retaining a sense of cultural identity and social context.

The Real Question

The question is not whether a bikini is moral or immoral.

The question is not whether a saree is superior to Western clothing.

The question is not whether women should have freedom of choice.

The real question is simple:

Why are standards of appropriateness applied selectively?

If a revealing outfit during a Raksha Bandhan celebration is perfectly acceptable because clothing should not matter, then why was an off-shoulder gown at a National Award ceremony considered controversial?

If attire contributes to the dignity and symbolism of an occasion, then why should that reasoning apply to one event but not another?

To me, these are fair questions.

Consistency Matters

A society does not become progressive by abandoning standards.

Nor does it become traditional by enforcing them.

A mature society applies its principles consistently.

If we believe clothing is irrelevant, let us stop judging everyone for it.

If we believe certain occasions deserve a particular decorum, let us apply that standard equally.

What we cannot do is criticize one person, celebrate another for doing something similar, and then pretend there is no contradiction.

That is not progress.

That is selective outrage dressed up as principle.

P.S. : This article is not a judgment of either actress. I have used them as examples because public figures often come to represent broader social attitudes and cultural viewpoints. My concern is not with the individuals themselves, but with the double standards reflected in the public reaction to them.